Discovering Myself

Content, but at the same time Empty. I think my emptiness comes from lack of love and a lack of answers. I want to fix this, but i cant get any answers. I need to find my way, my calling, and what I truly believe in.

Am i happy? or do I feel happy? the only happiness, the only fulfillment, the only total living I will experience is rite here rite now. I will not replace God with Truth in my heart anymore because I have come to the realization that God is Truth. Philosophy is a good thing to collect, yet I feel like if I were to die rite now I would neither go to heaven nor hell.. but become a black whole somewhere in Outter space. This lack of faith proves to me that I need to truthfully examine and correct my thoughts. I’m going to shift out any unpure thoughts in my mind and learn how to be a real man. I'm going to read books and im going to gain knowledge and then i will practice my principles. Equilibrium in the mind, knowledgeable conscience, the love to learn, a total mind revolution. Fair enough.

I am currently aiming to find out what my reality is. We each have our own idea of reality.. through discussion and reading i hope to ascertain the knowledge i need to find my place and figure out why im here and what i should really be doing here..